February 13, 2020

up there between the gray folds,

anything is possible.

then i walk through the door,

and nothing is.

February 13, 2020

the waves crash down.

the words spill out,

clog my nose,

fill my lungs.

every time

feels like 

i will drown.

September 5, 2017

I starved myself ,

For a time.

A hunger too great

To fully recover.

I put my body on display

For glory.

The desire to be seen.

My body broke.

So I stuffed myself,

Full of anger and rebellion.

Unable to satiate the hunger.

To be seen.

A hunger too terrifying

To feel.

So I numbed.

My m...

February 22, 2017

Why learn to sit still?

Except to live

A life of meaning

And joy.

Therefore, I must enter

The depths of personal darkness,

Boredom, fear.

Writhing in the discomfort.

Longing to escape.

All this to live in ease.

Like birth.

Every rush one step closer

To life.

December 24, 2016

Children do not pretend to know

how the world works.

The endless why. 

I should be just as persistent. 

A desire to learn so strong

ego sleeps.

Then I will learn I know

nothing,

and life is a collection

of experiences

interpreted

to confirm my beliefs.

Therein lies the transformat...

August 24, 2016

You dropped with a rush of water and blood.

My stomach turned.

Knowing what’s to come.

I walked in the hot summer.

Uncomfortable, irritable.

The waves of contractions rising,

Into the hospital.

Pain, fear, strangers.

You sensed my fear.

You stalled.

You became the teacher.

Of pat...

August 22, 2016

My work these days,​​

To own what is mine.

Not to claim that which is not.

Rather show up and be;

Ordinary.

Social media robs me

Of ordinary’s beauty.

I fill my head,

With its endless barrage

Snapshots of others’ false perfection.

My heart aches.

Longing for my simple life.

Longin...

August 19, 2016

You came into this world on fire.

Commanding the room’s attention.

Me in awe of you.

Teaching me to be free.

Your heart beats like the roar of a lion.

You told me yourself.

Nothing will stop you.

No one can have you.

For you make the rules.

My only hope.

You let me join you.

August 18, 2016

I lost my voice once, twice, many times.

Only now do I see it.

Thirty years in the making.

Two years into healing.

My daughter grabs at my throat for comfort.

It bothered me so.

But now I know,

Why.

To heal me.

Her touch my reminder,

To speak up.

For me, for her, for all.

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